FREE ESSAY ON TAKING CARE OF OUR CHILDREN

TAKING CARE OF OUR CHILDREN

We who have been entrusted with the education and care of children are obligated to go
"above and beyond" when it comes to looking out for their welfare. Educators and
administrators have no recourse but to look beyond the surface, investigate if necessary,
and protect the children to whom we have made ourselves responsible.
Dave Pelzer, who is currently an advocate for abused children, has written a compelling
three book series detailing his own life as an abused child and the aftereffects of his
abuse. His case was the third worst case of child abuse on record in the state of
California. (Pelzer, 1995, 168) Pelzer's mother was an alcoholic who was both physically
and emotionally abusive to him. What made this a terrible situation more unique was that
the mother did not abuse her other four children. Only Dave was the target of her hatred.
Pelzer's father, also an alcoholic, who ignored his wife's abusive tendencies, even
though he secretly indicated to his son that he did not condone it, compounded the
abusive behavior. The father's silence served to validate the mother's actions. Pelzer's
teachers and administrators also maintained silence, thus compounding his feeling of
isolation. These events occurred during the 1960's and early 1970's, so the behavior of
both Pelzer's father and his educators was not unusual. Physical discipline was more
accepted during that time than it is now.
Pelzer was rescued from his mother's cruelty in 1973 by a school nurse and counselor,
after dealing with her extreme abuse for almost ten years. His teachers and
administrators had for years seen him attend school in rags, unwashed, often with bruises
and abrasions, but as stated earlier, these were different times. When the school nurse
determined she could no longer stand by and accept this abusive behavior, she saw to it
that county services was contacted. Pelzer goes on to relate how his emotional damage
contributed to his moving often between foster homes. He never felt adequate, and these
feelings of inadequacy compounded Pelzer's problems and anxieties that children in foster
homes normally feel. Pelzer speaks of his first marriage ending in failure, due mostly to
his lack of ability to trust and effectively communicate with his wife. His adult life
has been built around raising his son in as healthy and environment as possible. He
speaks repeatedly of wanting to ensure the cycle of abuse does not continue through him.
His second marriage has been a close-knit partnership, with trust and open lines of
communication.
The purpose in recounting so much information in Pelzer's books is to remind us that we,
as educators, must take our responsibilities as caretakers of children with the highest
degree of importance. Even though child abuse is abhorrent, it can be stopped and, as in
the case of Dave Pelzer, through discipline and hard work, the cycle of abuse can be
broken. Although these abusive types of parents are thankfully in the minority, they do
exist. It is therefore imperative that we maintain awareness of any unusual circumstances
we may notice concerning our children. Reclusive behavior, unexplained bruises or other
marks, unattended physical hygiene, or violent outbursts should be cause for concern.
(Gestwicki, 435) This is not to say that we should become paranoid and report every child
with a bruise as a victim of abuse. We should, however, be aware of unusual mannerisms or
circumstances and act when we feel we have a right to be concerned. Documenting any
suspicions and findings is essential. This can uncover any trends or patterns that may
exist. Keep in mind that children will often cover up for and attempt to protect abusive
parents. This is also a huge load for a child to bear; the responsibility of "taking care
of" a parent who is abusive is an excessive burden. (Somers, 62) Valerie Bivens, a social
worker in California, stresses that most of us are unaware of the extent of child abuse.
Often instances of abuse go unreported, and the child may turn their anger against
themselves or others, continuing the cycle of abuse. (Pelzer, 1995, 171) Over three
million cases of child abuse were reported in 1996, and nearly one third of that number
were substantiated cases. (Gestwicki, 435) 
Claudia Black stated that children who are abused would normally have feelings of low
self-worth. Those who should be loved and trusted abuse them; therefore these children do
not feel safe or protected. (Somers, 33) 
Compounding our concerns even more are studies that show that teachers, contract workers,
and other school employees are also among those who mistreat our children. (Karp, 78)
Many states don't administer background checks for teachers or other school employees.
This allows those with criminal records to move from one school system to another, often
from state to state, in order to continue to teach or work in some capacity within the
education system. Missouri currently does not have a requirement for background checks
for contract workers. This means that a janitor or person who works in a lunchroom has
the capability to be convicted of a sex crime and be hired on at another institution
without fear of being recognized by his/her criminal record. This is more than a little
alarming. Kansas' laws are even more lenient, not requiring a background check for
teachers. (Karp, 81) This puts the onus on us as teachers, administrators, counselors,
and parents to carefully evaluate all adults with whom we see our children make contact.
There is no such thing as being too careful. Again, we needn't become paranoid and start
witch-hunts, but we must remain cognizant of what is going on with those under our care.

Abuse is an unpleasant topic, at best. However, if we are to do justice to the children
we care for, we must be aware of its existence. Of the millions of reported cases of
child abuse each year, how many could have been changed or halted by a concerned teacher
or administrator? If we maintain awareness we can make a difference in a child's life.
Isn't that what drew us to working with children in the first place?
Bibliography
Gestiwicki, Carol. Home, School, and Community Relations. New York: Delmar Thomson
Learning, 2000
Karp, Hal. "Who's Going to School With Your Kids?" Reader's Digest 156 (2000): 76-82.
Pelzer, Dave. A Child Called "It": One Child's Courage to Survive. Deerfield Beach, FL:
Health
Communications, Inc., 1995.
Pelzer, Dave. The Lost Boy: A Foster Child's Search for the Love of a Family. Deerfield
Beach,
FL: Health Communications, Inc., 1997.
Pelzer, Dave. A Man Named Dave: A Story of Triumph and Forgiveness. New York: Penguin
Group, 1999.
Somers, Suzanne. Wednesday's Children: Adult Survivors of Abuse Speak Out. New York: 
Putnam/HealingVision, 1992.
Bibliography
Gestiwicki, Carol. Home, School, and Community Relations. New York: Delmar Thomson
Learning, 2000
Karp, Hal. "Who's Going to School With Your Kids?" Reader's Digest 156 (2000): 76-82.
Pelzer, Dave. A Child Called "It": One Child's Courage to Survive. Deerfield Beach, FL:
Health
Communications, Inc., 1995.
Pelzer, Dave. The Lost Boy: A Foster Child's Search for the Love of a Family. Deerfield
Beach,
FL: Health Communications, Inc., 1997.
Pelzer, Dave. A Man Named Dave: A Story of Triumph and Forgiveness. New York: Penguin
Group, 1999.
Somers, Suzanne. Wednesday's Children: Adult Survivors of Abuse Speak Out. New York: 
Putnam/HealingVision, 1992.