FREE ESSAY ON CHILDREN OF ALCHOLICS

CHILDREN OF ALCHOLICS

Children Of Alcoholics 
Topic Description The topic I chose for the research assignment is children of
alcoholics.
I chose to focus more on the children that are involved in families of alcoholics rather
than on the family as a whole, because I felt there would be too much information.
Because I grew up in a stable, relatively normal family, I chose to research a topic in
which I did not have experience with. The participants that I chose for the interview
are
people that I know to have problems with parental alcoholism. Both of the interviewees
are mature enough to reflect upon their childhood experiences, and are also still
dealing
with them to a point. The male participant is a friend of my sister, and the female
participant is my roommate. I will discuss the research that I have done on children of
alcoholics and then I will discuss the interviews. Introduction The National Association
for Children of Alcoholics reports that there are an estimated 11 million children of
alcoholics under the age of eighteen in the United States ("Children of Alcoholism:
Important facts"). Additionally the association states that almost one in every five
adult
Americans lived with an alcoholic while growing up ("Children of Alcoholism:
Important facts"). These statistics are horrifying. Living with an alcoholic is a very
dangerous and emotionally stressful experience. Effects of growing up in an alcoholic
family include Fetal Alcohol Syndrome for a baby that is exposed to alcoholism in the
womb, hyperactivity, alexithymia, low self esteem, child abuse and many others.
Teenagers who are children of alcoholics are emotionally neglected and might start
drinking earlier than their peers. Adults who have survived living with an alcoholic
family often have trouble functioning in relationships. In the 1970's, researchers and
other professionals began to look deeply into the impact of parental alcoholism on
children (Jacob and Seilhamer 168). This began to open America's eyes to the dangers
of being a child of an alcoholic. Although research on this issue has relatively just
started, concern for these unfortunate children has been documented as far back to the
time of Aristotle (Jacob and Seilhamer 168). The gin epidemic in England during the
1700's sparked concern due to high infant morbidity and mortality (Jacob and
Seilhamer). Problems associated with being the child of an alcoholic regained national
attention in the past 25 years with the formation of such groups as the National
Association for Children of Alcoholics, and programs for treatment and prevention such
as Al-Ateen (Jacob and Seilhamer 168). The amount of attention that is paid to studying
and trying to help children of alcoholics indicates how much of a problem it is. Lindy
Boggs, former Congresswoman and chairperson of the Task Force of Crisis Intervention
once remarked, "Alcohol abuse seemed to be connected to and exacerbate, so many
problems that American families and their children face" ("Alcohol Abuse and its
Implications for Families"). Although this paper will discuss the many family issues
that
accompany being a relative of an alcoholic, the main focus will be on the children of
alcoholics. Children of alcoholics are important to observe and study because they are,
in
most cases, the innocent victims of parental alcohol abuse. Sara Markowitz and Michael
Grossman articulate the importance of parental alcohol abuse by stating, "Alcohol use
and abuse is an important research topic because of the significant costs alcohol abuse
imposes on individual users, their families, and society as a whole" (309). Dangers from
Conception Being born to a mother who is an alcoholic is a struggle from conception.
Some of the outcomes that can occur from this type of pregnancy are spontaneous
abortion, still birth and Fetal Alcohol Syndrome (Windel 30). The latter is a term that
refers to birth defects common to children whose mothers were chronic alcoholics who
drank heavily throughout pregnancy (Windel 29). Some of the abnormalities of children
with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome are growth retardation, central nervous system deficits,
developmental delay, brain malformations, and characteristic facial features. These
effects of being born to an alcoholic mother have a devastating effect on both the child
and the family as a whole. Families that deal with miscarriages and still births are
faced
with emotional distress which could include: "sadness, frustration, disappointment and
anger" (Knox and Schacht 341). This may worsen the condition of the alcoholic mother
because she might "blame" herself for the death (Knox and Schacht 341). Dealing with
such problems as hyperactivity and developmental delay create extra stress on the
parents
of the children (Knox and Schacht 332). Even in children that do not suffer from Fetal
Alcohol Syndrome, there are other detriments associated to being in a family with a
history of alcoholism. Corral et al. "observed lower performance in children with a
family history of alcoholism than in children with out alcoholic relatives in
attentional,
visiospatial, and frontal tasks" (509). In addition, developmental difficulties may be
expressed in a child of an alcoholic and include "elevated motoric activity, attention
deficits, reactivity, impulsivity, and anxiety" (Hussong et al. 453). Again, all of
these
outcomes are an added stress on the family of the child. Effects of Alcohol on the
Family
Alcoholism impacts families of all races, socioeconomic status, religions, and other
backgrounds. Although each family responds and deals with alcoholism differently, there
are several universal problems that most families must face. Ruth Ann Seilhamer and
Theodore Jacob have proposed a "pathway" in which parental alcoholism affects
offspring (176). This pathway of will provide the structure in which the ways children
of
alcoholics are affected are discussed. Ethanol Effects The first step in the pathway is
consumption of the alcohol. The intake of the alcohol leads to three possible effects.
One
of the first effects is the "ethanol effects" (Seilhamer and Jacob 176). In this direct
result
of alcohol consumption, the ability to be an "effective parent" is impaired (Seilhamer
and
Jacob 176). According to Cathy Spatz Widom, in the article "Child Abuse and Alcohol
Use and Abuse", "under the influence of alcohol, individuals who may already be
stressed may misinterpret cues and resort to abusive behavior" (291). Many parents that
abuse alcohol perform their duties differently when intoxicated and when sober
(Ackerman 13). According to Robert Ackerman, author of Let Go and Grow, "When
drinking, the alcoholic would demonstrate irresponsible behavior to the child, and when
sober would try to do all of the positive parenting at one time" (13). The behaviors
exhibited by the alcoholic parent affect the child psychologically, because there is no
consistency in parenting. Child Abuse Child abuse is one of the most devastating side
effects of ethanol consumption. Abuse can range from psychological abuse to physical
abuse and in some cases sexual abuse. There are many statistics that support the fact
that
alcoholism and abuse go hand in hand. Markowitz and Grossman estimate that around
"forty percent of all cases of child maltreatment (including physical abuse, sexual
abuse
and neglect) involve alcohol" (310). Additionally, studies shows that "thirteen percent
of
child abuse cases involved a perpetrator who was intoxicated at the time of the attack",
and that "in sixty nine percent of cases of child abuse, at least one parent was an
alcoholic" (Markowitz and Grossman 310). Family Effects There are many ways in
which families are affected by alcoholism. Marital strain is one of the primary outcomes
of parental alcoholism. Many times, if one parent is an alcoholic and the other is not,
the
non-alcoholic parent has a great deal of stress and responsibility. Spouses of
alcoholics,
may be resentful or frustrated with their partner's actions. The non-alcoholic parent
must
perform the duties of both parents when the alcoholic is too intoxicated to fulfill
them.
Consequently, non-alcoholic parents may be "inconsistent, demanding and frequently
neglect the children" (Duffy). Lindy Boggs asserts, "Spouses of alcoholics cannot
support
their children emotionally because they are so wrapped up in their own survival"
("Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families"). Studies have shown that it is
unlikely for husbands of female alcoholics to stay married (Ackerman 50). Thus,
additionally emotional strain is placed upon all family members. Having financial
difficulties is another issue that families of alcoholics cope with. The family may have
to
give up certain privileges due to the amount of money spent on alcohol. Anyone that is a
chronic drinker of alcohol is susceptible to a "host of medical problems, which in turn
may compound to financial problems" (Seilhamer and Jacob 176). Doctor and hospital
bills are a large financial burden on a family, which could create more tension and
stress.
Because many alcoholics' drinking interferes with employment, unemployment is closely
related to alcoholism (Boggs). Without one possible source of income, and money being
spent on an addiction, a family would experience great financial distress. Children may
not receive the nutrition and necessities that are needed. Children of alcoholics often
experience social isolation or difficulties (Seilhamer and Jacob 176). Ellen Duffy from
the Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters reports that, "Children may be ashamed of their
home or afraid they will be embarrassed in front of their friends" ("The Effects of
Alcoholism on the Family"). So, in order to escape the embarrassment, the children of
alcoholics tend to shy away from friendships. The "anxiety, depression and avoidance"
that many children of alcoholics feel lead to "withdrawal, isolation and poor social
skills
over time" (Hussong et al. 455). And, because the alcoholic parent or parents are more
attentive at sober times than when intoxicated, the children receive a conflicting
portrayal of intimacy and family "cohesiveness" (Seilhamer and Jacob 182). Modeling
Effects Although alcoholism is a genetic disorder, environmental factors are also
important in the manifestation of the disease (Windel 9). Children look up to their
parents and model their behavior, so it is no surprise that a great number of children
of
alcoholics turn into alcoholics themselves. Cathy Spatz Widom suggests, "Early onset
and heavy use of alcohol may represent a coping strategy used by abused and neglected
children to help them adapt to their early childhood trauma and to distance themselves
from the painful realities they experienced" (295). The children dealing with parental
alcoholism learn from parental actions that to deal with stress or problems, drinking is
viable option. This is not a healthy response to stress and the family problems are
never
resolved. Further Effects According to the pathway described by Seilhamer and Jacob,
both the family effects and the ethanol effects lead to "disrupted parenting" (176). As
mentioned before, alcoholic parents do not provide a consistent and supportive
environment (Seilhamer and Jacob 177). In some cases, there is no motivation for
children to perform well because parents are too wrapped up in dealing with alcoholism,
and pay little attention to accomplishments of the child (Ackerman 7). All of these
effects of alcoholism lead to "child adjustment difficulties" (Seilhamer and Jacob 176).
Academic Performance Being in a family of an alcoholic has devastating effects on a
child's performance academically. In addition to being at a disadvantage due to being
born with "cognitive and attentional impairments" caused by parental alcoholism,
children must face additional hurdles (McGrath et al. 20). Because alcoholic and
dependent parents often do not provide structure and are inconsistent, the children have
poor organizational skills (McGrath et al. 19). Alcoholics may be dealing with their own
impairments and "may not provide an intellectually stimulating environment that
encourages academic competency" (McGrath et al. 19). Education is an area in which a
child should be encouraged and supported. Without proper values instilled in their young
minds, children of alcoholics are robbed of their opportunity to succeed in life.
Emotional Impact In his book, Let Go and Grow, Robert Ackerman lists some concerns
of young and adolescent children of alcoholics. For young children the emotional
conflicts are: worrying about the health of the alcoholic parent and fights between the
alcoholic and the dependent, being confused by the inconsistency and unpredictability of
the family patterns, feeling unloved and being scared by the possibility of violence in
the
family, and feeling responsible for the alcoholic's drinking (Ackerman 52). Adolescents
have other conflicts such as: being concerned about what others think of their families'
alcoholism and whether or not they will inherit the disease; dealing with living with an
alcoholic and how to develop better skills for coping with their parents' alcohol abuse;
worrying about the health of their parents and how to "survive their parents' troubled
relationship" (Ackerman 52). Children of alcohol dependent parents are often deprived
of having enjoyable experiences as a family. Because the children are conditioned to
constantly handle conflict and crisis, they are unable to relax their defenses and have
fun
(Ackerman 9). This is a horrible way to experience childhood and undoubtedly has an
emotional effect on the individual as a child and will be carried into adulthood. The
Alcoholic Cycle Numerous studies and research has attested to the fact that alcoholism
is
passed on through genetics and behavioral learning. Former Senator Paula Hawkins
revealed that, "the sons of alcoholic father are four times more likely to become
alcoholics, and the daughters of alcoholic mothers are three times as likely to become
alcoholics" ("Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families"). Because the children of
alcoholics "experience a greater number of life stressors than do non children of
alcholics", they are more likely to be depressed, have a lowered self esteem, and
associate with peers that are involved in deviant behaviors (McGrath et al. 19). These
characteristics which develop from being a child of an alcoholic are often the cause of
alcohol and other substance abuse (McGrath et al. 18). Alcoholic families often allow
this behavior due to the fact that little attention is paid to the child. Children of
alcoholics
are also prone to resolving conflicts by drinking, because the behavior is reinforce by
the
parents (Dunn and Goldman 579). Alcohol may serve a variety of functions for the
emotionally scarred child. It can reduce the feelings of isolation created by the
alcoholic
and their spouse, act as an escape from a neglecting and abusive environment, act as a
means to gain control over the child's life or be used to help boost the child's self
esteem
(Spatz Widom 295). Children with alcoholic parents are more likely to begin drinking at
an earlier age than their peers (Windel 15). Also, as mentioned previously, parental
alcoholism may cause hyperactivity. In a study by Michael Windel, it is shown that a
number of children who are hyperactive children of alcoholics become aggressive and
undersocialized teenagers (134). These teenagers consumed "larger quantities of alcohol"
than their peers and the behavior expressed "is predictive of adult alcohol abuse and
alcoholism" (Windel 134). Results of the Alcoholic Cycle It is a sad fact that many
children born to alcoholics will be destined to become alcoholics themselves. With both
genetic and environmental forces working against them, children of alcoholics have
little
chance of creating a normal, nurturing life for themselves and their future families
(Seilhamer and Jacob 170). Unfortunately, the emotional impact on being born to an
alcoholic family is long lasting, even if a child does not end up being an alcoholic.
Many
adult children of alcoholics developed "exaggerated coping styles," which "lead to
dysfunction in adulthood (Seilhamer and Jacob 168). It is difficult for children of
alcoholics to "achieve successful intimate relationships" in adulthood because all they
have ever known were negative relationships (Ackerman 10). Adult children of
alcoholics often find themselves intimately involved with someone who is an alcoholic,
or is in some way abusive. Thus, the suffocating and detrimental cycle of alcoholism
continues. Interviews In order to gain a more personalized perspective on being a child
of
an alcoholic, I conducted two interviews. It is important to understand that not all
families that have an alcoholic member of the family are the same. I learned this first
hand from the interviews that I conducted. First Interview The first interview that I
conducted was on an eighteen-year-old male, C E. He is the child of an alcoholic father
and is considered to be lower class in socioeconomic status. When asked if he drank or
used other substances on a usual basis he replied that he drank approximately once a
month and did not use other drugs. I asked the interviewee if he was afraid of becoming
an alcoholic and he replied that he wasn't. When furthered questioned about life as a
child of an alcoholic, he was rather unresponsive. I feel that this is a part of the
response
mechanism that most children of alcoholics possess. Ackerman states that often "the
parents live one way and instruct the children not to tell anyone or ask the child to
deny
to outsiders whatever he or she sees" (7). Thus, this child is not accustomed to talking
about the problems of his parents, therefore was not willing to share sensitive
information. Second Interview The second person that I interviewed was more open and
willing to share life experiences than the first. The interviewee is a nineteen-year-old
college student named J T. Both of her parents are alcoholics and she has received
counseling for the problems associated with being a child of an alcoholic. A great deal
of
the conflicts and experiences that J has been through can be explained by the issues
mentioned in this paper. Realization of a problem began at the age of five when she
remembers asking her parents to get a divorce. The interviewee's alcoholic parents had a
great deal of marital conflict, which is common in alcohol dependent families. On
several occasions, the interviewee was blamed for the parental arguments or blamed for
the alcoholism of the parent. There were also financial problems due to the constant
purchase of alcohol. She has seen the receipts of five or six bottles of vodka and
scotch
purchased at a time. Because her parents were concerned with their own lives and
drinking, she never really had a structured childhood. Ms. T recalls never having a set
curfew and never having to prove to her parents where she was going when she went out.
This lack of guidance and consistency is another characteristic of alcoholic parents'
behavior. Although as a child she was not asked to keep the alcoholism of either parent
a
secret, the interviewee was often embarrassed to invite friends over. This is a common
reaction among children of alcoholics. When she was you, Ms. T got very upset when she
would find alcohol hidden around the house. However, as a teenager, she would just take
the alcohol and save it for herself. She started drinking at age fourteen and was even
given alcohol often as a baby. The family never had any "fun" family events because
most holidays, occasions, or seldom trips were disrupted by alcohol abuse. As in other
families, Ms. T's parents were not very encouraging or supportive in terms of education.
They just expected her to do well and punished her when she did not perform to their
standards. When asked if she was afraid of becoming an alcoholic, the interviewee
responded that she was. Because alcoholism is very abundant in her family, she tries not
to fall into the pattern of becoming an alcoholic. She is very careful not to drink when
she is upset and does not let alcohol determine if she is having a good time. I believe
that
the statement made by Ms. T that most encompasses the feeling of being a child of
alcoholic parents is this: "I don't know what a problem is because I don't know what
normal is." The life that she has lived as a child of alcoholics is, unfortunately, the
only
one she knows. Conclusion As can be seen by examining the wealth of literature on
alcoholism and conducting personal interviews with children of alcoholics, alcoholism is
a problem that many families are faced with. Many institutions have been created in
order to help the family members that are caught in the web of alcohol abuse. In
studying
families, it is important to learn more about alcoholic families because they represent
a
large number of families. Every member of a family is affected by an alcoholic, whether
it be in marital problems, child abuse or a host of other problems. Family therapists
need
to understand the dynamics of a family dealing with alcoholism in order to be successful
in aiding the family. More efforts need to be taken to help the innocent victims of
alcohol's devastating wrath. The words or former Senator Paula Hawkins are a call for
action: "In our mutual effort to create a better world for our children, we must ensure
that
their freedom to develop and grow, from fetus to maturity, is not destroyed because of
the disease of alcoholism" ("Alcohol Abuse and its Implications for Families"). 
Bibliography 
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